Cultivating safety in sexuality workshops

Since the tsunami of #metoo hit our cultural and social consciousness, we have seen wave after wave of statements of abuse by people in power. No area of life has been untouched by these outings– from government to charities, church to corporations. In the spiritual community every field from yoga to meditation has been shaken and stirred. In this sense the Tantra world is no different from any other sphere of life. However, what makes it particularly chilling is that many people entered the field of sacred sexuality seeking healing, and instead found themselves being further traumatised by what they encountered.

In Tantric work it is not uncommon for difficult emotions and suppressed memories to surface. Sometimes people experience catharsis and tears as old patterns and stories fall away. In the moment this is held with presence and compassion, and supported in moving through the body. What is essential is that the person is able to process their experience as fully as they can in that moment. It is only in a space of safety and security that we can really allow ourselves to open into the fullness of experiences. Softness and sensitivity are our guides.

What is problematic is when people have been pushed beyond what they are able to process – all in the name of breaking through sexual shame, cultural taboos, or “smashing the Ego”. Rather than being supported to explore and honour their boundaries and needs, folks have been pressurised to break through their “resistance” to the detriment of their physical and mental wellbeing.

What is shown time and time again through these revelations is how challenging it is for many people – in particular women – to feel empowered to honour the wisdom and knowing of their own being. We have been brought up with the message that we must entrust power over to authority figures whether teachers or doctors. We have been conditioned to disconnect from our bodies and override the subtle cues that something is not right for us. We have been taught to ignore our intuition and suppress our emotions. And we are so longing for connection and community that we give up our individual needs in order to fit in and belong.

So, how do we reclaim our sovereignty whilst surrendering into our spirituality? How can you stay safe when igniting such potentially explosive material as sexuality? What could be the ways forward for us all?

There are three principles which can support you on your journey…


Tantra is founded on the twin principles of Energy (Shakti) and Awareness (Shiva). Much neo-Tantric teaching has focused on the cultivation of high energetic states, orgasm and ecstasy. However, this is only one dimension. We also need to cultivate the quality of awareness; witnessing ourselves in the experience.

Awareness is not the small self that shows up as self-consciousness; not able to fully engage for fear of “what other will people think”. Rather this is the big “Self” of consciousness that it always present within us. Awareness keeps us anchored in the present moment, able to notice and witness our experience as the “one who is experiencing” rather than floating off into realms of fantasy or disassociation, which are mechanisms of escape from reality.


Sensitivity begins with your capacity to feel yourself first, before even starting to think about feeling another. How open are you to the environment around you? How keenly do you experience each moment of aliveness? Many people have had sensitivity drummed out of them from an early age. Or life feels so overwhelming that we numb ourselves out in order to survive.

In life there is a flow between giving and receiving, activity and receptivity. However, many people get stuck in one mode – usually the one associated with outward action and doing. When we are constantly pushing or reaching out into the world, the quality of sensitivity in noticing what is coming back towards us is diminished. We are reaching out for an experience but not attuned to what is actually coming back our way.

Sensitivity begins with feeling life moving through us as it is – without agenda or expectation. Once we have experienced this force of life, we realise that it is a part of us. We do not need to reach out to another to provide it to us. We are in a place where we can share what is moving through as an overflowing of our being. We touch the other as if touching ourselves and are responsive to the feedback that flows between us in the aliveness of the moment.

Slowing Down

Our world is increasingly fast-paced and performance driven. We want it all and we want it now. We have lost a sense of appreciation for the time it takes to truly learn and master a new skill. We are a culture of over-stimulated intensity junkies focused on quick wins and fast results.

Tantra is not a journey than can be fast-tracked; it requires continuous and consistent commitment to your practise and personal growth. Whilst powerful breakthroughs and exciting energetic shifts can be experienced in the moment, it is only by giving space for integration and honouring the movement of the experience beyond the workshop and into our lives that we can truly move glimpse the potential of the Tantric path.

Awareness, sensitivity and slowing down are all skills that can be cultivated. They require time and space to open into more subtle experience. Are you ready to awaken to a new way of being?

Togetherness – 18th & 19th November 2017

This dynamic festival explores human connection, intimacy and sexuality in all their forms.

It’s about…

  • Improving the quality of contact with everyone in your life
  • Meeting new people from different backgrounds
  • Enriching all your relationships

Gayatri is offering her ever-popular ‘Massage a Trois’ workshop there.

Discover more at

Tantra Festival London – 14th & 15th October 2017

Gayatri is delighted to be part of the 2017 London tantrafestival

‘Heaven on Earth – Dare to live in Ecstasy’
taking place in Shoreditch, Central London on the 14th & 15th October 2017

tantrafestival is a celebration of Tantra in its many facets. For one weekend, the best practitioners and teachers in the field of Tantra from the UK and Europe come together to create a dynamic and exciting programme of lectures, workshops and presentations on a broad number of Tantra topics. Among all these inspiring activities, the festival also includes artistic performances, stimulating Conscious Talks™, fun games and opportunities to connect with like-hearted people.

Join Gayatri on Sunday afternoon for her workshop “This Body, My Prayer” on the sacred nature of the body.

Discover more at

T O G E T H E R N E S S: An intimate festival of human connection

For 2 days in London in May in London we are taking over the top of a skyscraper and filling it with some of the best teachers in the world so you can learn how to

 • enrich your relationships

• expand your sexuality

• explore new ways of connecting with others

• improve the quality of contact you have with everyone in your life

Sessions include

 Expanding Your Sexuality • Art of Sensual Touch • Deep Listening • Boundaries & Empowerment • Mindfulness & Sexuality • Liberating Gender • The Soulmate Delusion • Sensory Experience • Art of Being with Alan Lowen • How to be a Lazy Guru • Body Positive Photo Studio • Singing & Intimacy • Digital Dating Detox • Love Lounge 101 • Sensuality & Ritual • Orgasmic Cacao Breathing • Shhh Dating • Procabulary • Deepening Sensuality for Partners • Playfulness & Connection • Holding for Healing • Saturday Night Cacao Dance Party

Teachers include



 Discover more at

Art of Being Festival (Czech Republic)


5 days opening and awakening to the mystical magic of becoming present in our whole being. Set in stunning countryside in the Czech Republic.

“We dive deep, we fly high, we share intimately and celebrate passionately, guided by Alan’s carefully chosen team of teacher-guides and musicians–men and women who love to pour out their life-transforming gifts with real presence, to enthrall and thrill us with music that may carry us into mystic space or dance us off our feet, who love the inspiration of working together, and love above all the rising festival wave that uplifts and transports us all into the realm of MIRACLE AND MYSTERY.” Alan Lowen, The Patron, Founder and Spiritual Father of the Art of Being Festival

Gayatri is honoured to return for the second year as a teacher and guide. We hope you will join us!

Discover more…


Osho Leela Winter Conscious Sexuality Festival

Join Gayatri and a host of other teachers from 1st to 5th February, as the  Winter Conscious Sexuality festival returns for its third year.

At Osho Leela they create and hold a grounded, safe and non-judgmental space for you to dip into the heart of conscious sexuality. This festival is a great opportunity for you to develop more awareness of who you are as a sensual and sexual being. There will be a choice of daily sessions and meditations, plus morning Yoga, one-to-one sessions, the Love Lounge, yurt sauna and more goodies. Give yourself four days of Heaven on Earth!

For more information and booking, go to

Desire & Intimacy: Conscious Sexuality Festival for the Under 40’s

Osho Leela are excited to present this event for under 40’s – and we are delighted to be offering some yummy workshops there!

Osho Leela has been running Conscious Sexuality Festivals for 9 years and is well known for its professional and playful approach. It is the first time they offer the festival to a designated age group, and we expect it to be a very juicy affair.

Aimed at a younger generation, hungry for authentic teachings regarding Desire and Intimacy, and looking for a safe space to express their true sexuality, this 5 day event has a full and varied programme with a great line up of teachers all passionate in their field.

This festival is for you if:

  • You’re ready to open up and discover your potential as a fully alive sexual being
  • Feel you never got taught anything meaningful about Desire and Intimacy from parents, school or the media
  • You’re tired of ‘groping in the dark’, trying to make sense of this whole ‘sex and love’ thing
  • You’re ready to play, take a risk and have FUN!

Come alone, come with a friend, come single or in a relationship. All are welcome. To book, go to –

Tantra Festival London

We are delighted to be part of the London Tantra Festival, ‘Experience the Sublime’.

This year events are taking place in 3 halls, as well as the more intimate space of the Tantra Temple. The huge main hall be hosting bigger activities such as dance workshops, massage demo, and of course the renowned Tantric Heart Party on Saturday night, while the smaller halls will be for more intimate workshops and closer connections. Santosha restaurant is promising to provide us all with delicious and satisfying fresh food, juices, smoothies and delicious deserts.

Enjoy a taste of acclaimed teachers who will be presenting over this Sublime weekend, such as Advaita Stoian, Leora Lightwoman, Maria Porsfelt, Tara Yoga Centre, Patricia & Marcelo of Vital Development, Ecstatic Joy Temple, Mal & the Tantric Journey team, Elena Angel, Catherine and Magdalena from Venus, Foca, Bogdan and Kieran from The Path of the Conscious Man, as well as many wonderful newcomers to the Tantra Festival line-up including Jayne & Tim from The Love Making Retreat, DJ Maryam Bash from Paris, artist Vesa Kiviven from Finland, Five Rhythms Dance, Gayatri & Doug (yes – us!), and Ipsalu Tantra from Ethiopia! Check them all out here

The devoted team are there to take care of you as valued friends, and are there to help you over the weekend.

We look forward to making a true leap together into the sublime realms of the heart.

Check out the new website for more details at

Or follow the count down here

Simple Rituals for a Sacred Life

One thing I have noticed in life, is that the areas I have the most resistance to, are often the places where there is rich treasure for personal growth.

Just a few years ago the very word ‘ritual’ had a powerful aversion for me. You see, I had developed the idea that doing rituals had to look a certain way, and I that I would have to become someone different in order to do them ‘properly’. (In particular dressing in swathes of black velvet and lace, wafting incense, and making strange incantations in a muddy field came to mind).

I was enlightened by the awesome Barbara Carrellas on her fabulous Urban Tantra Training. Through the training I discovered that ritual has nothing to do with concepts or performance; it has everything to do with the intention you bring to the moment.

We perform routines every day – from brushing our teeth in the morning to the special pants we wear in special situations. When we imbue our routines with meaning, and perform them with a specific intention, then they become rituals.



What do you give meaning to in your life?


Many people find themselves feeling disconnected or overwhelmed with the busy-ness of life. The dissolving of many of the old forms (family, church, etc.) has meant that we have lost our anchors and find ourselves lost at sea. Without connection to community, season and the celebration of shared experience, life can blur into an amalgamous mass where there is less differentiation between our days.

Rituals are those anchors that mark the moments of life. They connect us to the deeper patterns and purpose of existence.

Rituals do not need to be complex. They can be simple steps that generate greater awareness in the every day. Here are a few simple rituals for every day personal practise…


Give thanks before eating

The practise of saying “Grace” is rather out-dated, but why not get ahead of the curve and reintroduce at your meal times? Saying “Grace” nourishes your soul as well as your belly!

Doug and I like to ‘weave’ a prayer, meaning everyone at the table has the opportunity to contribute their words of gratitude and acknowledgement.

We start with the phrase “Blessings on the food” and then everyone adds their own “Blessings on the…” Often it gets quite comical as people find more and more things to bless. The sacred doesn’t have to be serious!


Take a breath

Before you start anything – and I really mean anything from eating to poo-ing, writing to speaking, and everything else in between – take a breath.

The sacred is simply a breath away and we call our awareness to it when we take a moment to connect back in with the source of life.

Everything begins and ends with the breath.

(Deep gratitude to Avanti for suggesting this practise to me. It has been tremendously helpful.)


Wash it all away

If you take a shower or bath as part of your regular routine, you can imbue it with greater significance than simply removing dirt from your body.

Water is a wonderful element for cleaning ourselves energetically as well as physically. As you wash your body, imagine yourself washing away all the stuff of the day (experiences, thoughts, feelings) that might be clinging to you, and you no longer want. Let them be released in the flow of the water so that your whole being becomes refreshed.


Consecrate your love-making

Whether partnered or solo sexual experience, inviting divinity into your love-making, brings it to a whole new dimension.

The Tantric ritual of ‘Namaste’, brings awareness to the God/Goddess/Beingness within each of us. Namaste – “I honour the Divine in you”. Namaste is a bow offered as a gesture of honouring.

Sit face to face (if you are doing this alone you can look yourself in a mirror) and gaze into the other’s eyes for a few moments.

As you breathe in, bring your hand together in prayer position in front of your heart. Connect with a feeling of love.

As you breathe out, you both bring your forehead forward to touch the other. Close the eyes and focus awareness in between the brows in the place known as the third eye.

Take a few breaths together in the space and feel the unity between you.

With an in-breath, again you part.


Start your day your way

Morning time, when we first wake up, is a rich time for setting our intentions and even ‘vibration’ for the day. So how do you start your day? What is the first activity you turn your mind to? Is this aligned to how you wish your day to unfold? Do you start the day your way or do the demands of others (whether physically or virtually) take over?

Over the years I have done many different practises of meditation and exercise in the morning. Sometimes I get stuck on the question of “What’s the right thing for me to be doing at this time?” “Is it yoga, or shaking, or silent meditation? Or should I be writing those ‘Morning Pages’ I hear so much about? Or checking my emails?” And so on, and so on…

Just recently I have come to the realisation that what you do is way less important than having an intention, showing up to do it, and doing it consistently! It’s the commitment and dedication to your own personal practise, your own unique daily ritual, that really makes the difference.

Currently my ritual is to read a lesson from “A Course in Miracles” whilst drinking my morning coffee. Then chanting the Gayatri Mantra 108 times. The intention I hold for this practise is deeper connection to the Divine. For me it feels like when I show up in that intention, it offers a clear and strong message to Life. And Life can show up to meet me.

What is it that you most desire to experience in your life? How can you call this in through your daily routines? What is one simple thing you could do to create a truly blessed existence?